Opinion by William Wilczewski

Dear Santa:

Forget all the i-pods, X-boxes and e-phones. You can even forget my two front teeth, because all I want for Christmas is for all the members of the NFL, NBA and NHL to give us a 2010 filled with a love for the game instead of all the egotistical shenanigans that made professional sports into the circus-like, World Wrestling Federation business it has become. That’s why I find myself levitating toward NCAA sports, although the college ranks are also slowly moving to Fortune 500 entities in their own right.

On that note, please put an end to all the Bob’s Barber.com bowl games that have been added to the season’s festivities. They are lessening the meaning of what bowl games are supposed to represent. Remember the good ol’ days when roses, oranges and cotton were a treat? Piled up with all these other silly bowls nowadays, the importance is getting lost on commercial advertising and in the pockets of the (insert city names here) chambers of commerce.

Speaking of pockets, Tiger Woods’ were once very deep. Now, they’re about as shallow as Paris Hilton’s intellect. For Tiger, all I ask for is a new fire hydrant in front of his Florida mansion. He’s the only athlete I know that can set the world on fire by running over a watering device.

Another watering device that will likely need help during the holidays is Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones. It looks as though his tears will be flowing if he doesn’t get to host the Manny Pacquiao versus Floyd Mayweather Jr. mega-fight, slated for March 13, like he wants to.

Jones even offered a $25 million site fee—the biggest in boxing history—to host the bout at his new 100,000-seat Cowboys Stadium (which is equipped with the world’s largest TV set), but it looks as though Las Vegas’ MGM Grand is in the front-running.

Well, Jerry, while everything might be bigger in Texas, it may not always be better. Maybe next Christmas.

Also by next Christmas, I want the tarnish on Notre Dame’s golden dome to have vanished—at least a little bit.

The school’s football coach Charlie Weiss did his best, but I guess it just wasn’t good enough.

Please give Charlie a good job. He seems like a good guy and deserves it.

For his replacement, Brian Kelly, send him the four horsemen, Knute Rockne, the Gipper and the ghost of the Fighting Irish past—whatever it takes to get that program back on track.

I also want my wife to stop drooling every time Alex Rodriguez is on TV. I’m glad he finally had a good post-season for the Bronx Bombers in 2009 but, with the way she looks at him on the tube, my ego is getting more bruised than someone on the wrong end of a Mike Tyson uppercut.

On that note, my final—and most important—request for Christmas this year is a 2010 World Series title for the New York Yankees.

And, if you can’t give me that one, Santa, just make sure the Boston Red Sox don’t win it!

(What do YOU think? E-mail “Ski” at editorial@nogalesinternational.com.)